Moving from Fear to Action

“I am a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar.” ~~ Hoban “Wash” Washburne in the movie “Serenity”

This is one of my favorite quotes. It’s a line from the movie Serenity. And that is a film based on and that followed Joss Whedon’s TV show, Firefly. The character of Wash is the pilot and he is faced with slipping through enemy lines. (In case you didn’t know, I’m a syfy junkie.) The words spoken by Wash mean facing fear and acting anyway. It’s all about…  …knowing your goal, as clearly and as specifically as you can
… taking action
… trusting yourself
… being wholly in the moment, come what may.

What Must You Do?

I’m not one for grand actions myself. I’d rather keep a low profile, so I’m not talking about bold actions. Or, about making a grandiose gesture. I’m talking about taking whatever the next step is that’s right in front of you. It means…  … Taking a baby step.
… Taking teeny, tiny steps.
… And all the while, feeling the feels.
… Breathing.
… And noticing what is. And that includes taking note of the earth beneath your feet and the sky above your head. In March of this year, I decided to write my first book. I’ve been writing for years, in notebooks and scraps of paper. I did get published in my twenties, but I thought it was a fluke. My literature professor in college thought I had promise and submitted my poems to a contest and I won. Then, I submitted a short story to a magazine contest and won. But I’ve been afraid to show my writing to anyone since then. You know, the “who do you think you are monster” rearing it’s ugly head. The specter of that ghost kept me paralyzed, keeping my light under the proverbial bushel basket all the intervening years. I was cranky. I felt lost. I’d parked my pencil some years ago, thinking “What’s the use? No one will read what I write. It’s not good enough.”

What Happened?

Laura Di Franco and her Intuitive Writer’s Class happened. In that class, we did some feng shui writing… you know, writing to clear the cobwebs of the soul. While doing that, I came to realize that what my soul yearned for was creative expression. It took me all these years to realize that my unhappiness was due to giving myself the freedom to express my creative genius, whether anyone liked my writing or not. That night, the night of the fear exercise, I decided to re-focus on writing, to pick up my pencil again, taking teeny, tiny steps, like a baby learning to walk. I decided that the bugaboos of ‘not good enough’ and ‘no one cares’ wouldn’t keep me from doing what I love. And I got excited. Just choosing to work on my passion made me happy. It was as if I was a leaf in the wind, being carried forward towards a destiny unknown.

Where Am I Now?

If you really care to know, I’ve written nearly 500 pages of the novel. It is taking shape nicely. I’ve edited the chapters I’ve written so far to make the writing flow better. I have a rough outline of the rest of the novel and am working on the next chapter now. I’m not sure when this book will be completed. My goal is by the end of the year. But, who knows what will be facing me in the next two months? I’m not in a hurry. After all, it took Margaret Mitchell nine years to complete Gone with the Wind, didn’t it? All I know is that writing has set me free. That I am the happiest I’ve been in a long time. That my freedom to be me has been hard won but worth it. Isn’t yours?

How About You?

What would give you joy, if you felt free to grab on and do it? How can you face your joy and embrace it full on? What tiny steps can you take toward your freedom? Share with me what you discover, I’d like to know.